Do We Ever Really Find the “One”

Love like what the hell does it even mean?

We understand it when it comes to the people we are born into.  Our mother’s, father’s, children.  That type of love – although challenging sometimes – you typically do not have to question that love.

But what about a mate in life?  Do we really ever find the “one”?

I really don’t know the answer to that question, but what I do know – is that maybe we need to stop seeking the one and become the “one”.

I will have to elaborate on that cause at this point, you are probably looking at yourself and thinking – dam girl – I am the “one”.  But are you?  How honest are you in your current relationship?  Do you expect honesty yet not give it?  Do you continue to seek a “better” lover because you “deserve” one?  Let’s be real people!  Are you candid with your loved ones?  Do you express your feelings?  Do you even know who YOU are?  I mean really DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE?

Having a relationship will not validate you as a person.  Self discovery is hard, but one of the most rewarding and satisfying things you could ever accomplish.  Most of my life was spent dedicated to the needs of others – and now I am discovering my own needs, my own desires.

My insecurities are always heightened in a relationship.  But do you know why?  Because I was always the chameleon in the relationship.  Bending and turning to accommodate the needs of the men I wanted to be with.  Like look at me – I am perfect for you.  But that is fake.  Things that we do to “impress” a mate are really just a deceptive way for us chameleons to get the mate they want – then wonder why we aren’t happy.  Well dumb ass we aren’t happy because we are doing what THEY want and not what I want.

And y’all know what I am talking about too.  In the dating scene we all have a tendency to pretend to be something we are not to impress the date, and even modifier our normal behaviors because it is a date.

I, as well, am guilty of this, but no more.  Moving forward any dates will be conducted with 100% raw and unedited me, because that is who I am – the true me – and that is the one I want the next one to fall in love with.  Not the edited, and cleaned version.

I found true love.

True, unconditional love.

Within myself. img_20180515_103334_991

 

Broke and Broken

You know I think the most disappointing thing in life, is when you have friendships that fail because of greed.

Now I openly discuss that I am broke, and once broken.  We are all just trying to do the very best in making it in life.

I had someone who befriended me, and boosted me up, and of course, I took the bait.  Really thinking this person thought I had some talent.  Wow someone who actually believed in me, someone who I really thought was feeling what I was saying.

And then after a few days – I get hit with the hook.

Look.  I am happy with my life.  I am just being me.  Offering someone “studio time” is great – but then days later – you hit them with “yea it’s only $750.00” like really?

I know we are all just trying to make money – but don’t fake it to make it in this life.

It is irritating because if you actually listen to the lyrics in my songs – you will hear the struggle, and nothing is more like wow – you never listened to any of my shit.

Broke, Broken and Bitchy

I feel the way I do because I have been struggling my entire life, and yea maybe in some kind of crazy way, maybe the “extra” work I am putting into being myself, eventually turns profit, but when I say I’m broke, like I mean it.

It is hard making it out here – and like what kind of “friend” are you – if you aren’t paying attention to ANYTHING they have said.

I make poor look pretty – but like the struggle is real out there for families.

Don’t fake being friends with someone just to sell them shit.

 

Deception is for Dickheads Men and Women Alike

I know that I come off as a man hating feminist – but in reality – I love me some men.  I just avoid them at all costs because let’s be real – most of y’all have

RELATIONSHIP ADD

I am tired of getting hurt – so unless you come 100% I don’t want ya!

You do not have the right to be happy if you are out here hurting people because you can’t deal with your own truth.

Stop living a lie.

This one gonna hurt some

A Mother’s Love – Momma Rapper

Poetry/ Poems by Me

These are in reference to my life.  My daily struggle.  We all have them.  Being a mom – well dam like it is hard.  When the baby daddy isn’t around – you have to figure it out all alone.  I don’t regret one minute.  It shapes us for who we are.  Embrace it.  Let go.  Breathe.

A Mother’s Love

Starbucks Therapy

 

closed white and green starbucks disposable cup
Photo by Engin Akyurt on Pexels.com

My Five Minute Attitude Adjustment

Today is a rough day – but you know what?  That is okay – not every day is going to be rainbows and butterflies.

So what does today call for – some perky love from Starbucks.  I had me a gift card, and the wonderful young man at the Fowler location whipped up some good good.

While he has no idea what he did for me – there is a reason why we call some foods, comfort food.

I simply asked the man to make me something sugar free, that is comforting – and he made it happen.

To the gentleman at that location – high five buddy – you did a great job.

Sometimes we don’t know what people are going through – he didn’t know what I was going through – he didn’t have to.  He paid attention to what I needed and he delivered.  And I am thankful for that.  I got back to work – feeling much better.

He doesn’t know how much that little cup of joe meant to me – but it calmed down my nerves, so that I could have me a nice attitude adjustment.

Thanks Starbucks.

Post Coffee Attitude

 

 

Cheesy Chasing Omelette

Cheesy Chasing Omelette

When I say cheesy – I mean cheesy.

This omelette is actually incredibly easy to make – just – and feeds quite a few people.

So if you are on a tight budget – and trying to get creative with your eggs – here ya go.

Makes for a beautiful plating – and is quite scrumptious.

Make an omelette roll, top with some more yum.  If you are unfamiliar with how to roll an omelette – make a very thin layer, and roll like a roll-up.

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Omelette

6 eggs

1/4 cup of heavy whipping cream

Butter for the pan

Cheese sauce

2 tbsp of butter

1/2 cup of white sharp cheddar cheese

Salt, pepper, parsley, to taste.

The Cutest, Simple, Country, Shabby Chic, Homade Honky Wedding😎😎 Momma Rapper’s Daughter Got Married 😯😯

Yep my baby girl, only child, the two week overdue Angel face princess got herself hitched 😂😂

I have to say, this was the day I realized she is no longer a child.

As we were walking back after they said “I Do” I had that rush of OMG my baby just got married.

And I have to say, even tho we rushed to get the wedding done in 3 weeks, it came out fantastic. 😎😎

Momma loves you baby 💃💃💃

You really do look like Ariel 😍😍

Fyi, we did this on an incredibly tight budget, like zero dollar budget, so most of everything was done homemade. 🤗🤗 By yours truly.

With a little work and wit you can make anything happen

Remember I’m not just the Momma Rapper, I am a homemade loving Momma cause we poor💃 but I make poor pretty. 😏

My friend Debbie married them, OMG the vows, had people in awe. Business card in pictures.

Momma Rapper ~Reality~ Dreams Coming True for Small Town Girl on the Rise From Baking to Rapping and Women Empowerment She got it All

I know my music can be a little harsh for those who have sensitive ears (explicit)

But listen, this is my outlet.  I am finally free to live how I choose to, and this release of expression and emotion through music – has been the absolute best for me.

 

This is by far – my favorite song.  It is not only sweet, but sensual – and that ladies and gentleman makes for a beautiful song.

 

Warning:  Explicit

Pornographic in Nature

Language

Being Fat is Painful

My Fight

As discussed previously I have gastroparesis.  Today I am struggling.  A flare up from veggies.  Yes veggies.  Fibrous foods.  The struggle is real – but this is a fight I plan on beating.  Pushing through to the finale 🙂

 

food sugar breakfast white
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