Marley & Me – A Dog’s Tale

Meet Marley

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I can say without a doubt – he is the love of my life.  They always say dogs come into our lives for a reason – and I truly believe that.  To be quite honest I was kind of in that in between stage.  Wanting a dog, but knowing you can’t really afford another mouth to feed.  Well the kid and I had tossed around the idea, and it just so happened about a week after that conversation – along came home a very rough-looking pup.  A fat one, but a rough-looking one.

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(My two babies)

OMG isn’t he just the cutest.  Yes he is.  I know.  LOOK AT HIM hahahaha.  My daughter quite beautiful too – I KNOW.  I have beautiful babies.  Marley was actually her dog the first few weeks – but she is young – and well I used that against her to take possession of him.  I basically force adopted him hahahaha.  But really she knew him and I were meant to be.  Especially after the night she wanted to take him out-of-town and I had a complete crying fit – yeah – that was the night I knew I fell in love with him.

I am not joking either.  My daughter can attest to this story.  I was getting onto her about having the responsibilities of having a dog – and that she couldn’t be leaving during the weekends and leaving the dog to  me.

Then she pop off with – well I will take him with me.  HELL NO.  Like it was bad enough my child was grown – but like now you wanna take my grand baby riding around doing God knows what, what if he runs off or gets hurt.  He won’t know how to get home cause he just got here.  Yea yea – I know – I became my mother.

The thing is – that for those 3 weeks that Marley had been here – Katie had been gone on the weekends.  Me and this little one – we started doing things together.  Like, everything.  At the time he was a pup – I still had a regular vehicle.  So he got to go to the laundry mat, to the grocery store, I mean he was little so like you could just hold him like a baby hahaha.  screenshot_2017-12-01-10-45-35

Marley car rides

Isn’t he adorable 🙂 hahaha.

A bond that is really unmatched.  If I had to choose to do something with friends or Marley, it’s gonna be Marley.  I mean after all, he has been there through a lot.  And he is always down to do whatever.

All I got to say is “Marley wanna go ______” and he is like yep.  I could say let’s go to bed, he would be like, yep.  Wanna go on a walk, YEEEPPPP.  Wanna dance, yep.  Wanna throw fetch, yep.  Wanna sit out back and watch the stars, YEP.  He really does enjoy those things – or he is just pretty good at playing along hahahaha.

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Marley nap time

He gets me through the tough times.  He makes me laugh when I am sad.  He loves me unconditionally, despite how I look, how I feel, he is always there.  If I want to eat junk food, he says nothing, he just wants a bite, he is most definitely my partner in crime.  He is tough when he needs to be, even though he acts like a baby sometimes – when called to arms – he is there.

To be honest – he reminds me a little of my dad.  He does the things I know my dad would do if he was still here, and that would be comfort and protect.  Two things I’ve never experienced from a spouse, I at least had the blessing of having that growing up.  Something many people lack, and probably why I pose as a challenge for most men – because a weak man will never be a good match for me.

Yep, a Daddy’s girl.  Raised in the mud, tough as nails, a mouth you can’t control, witty and wild.

There are a lot of things that I know I would have never done alone, that I have been able to do because I have Marley by my side.  And a lot of those things have to do with my father.

As I mentioned in a previous blog post – we spent a great deal of time outdoors, as a family, building cypress furniture.  Even as kids, all of us, my cousins included would gather around a peel bark – or do whatever to earn money to able to go to the store.

Yea sounds crazy – but it taught us how to earn a living.  Nothing in life is free, NOTHING.  It cost someone, something, somehow, in some capacity, even if it is free to you.  Most of us picked up some tricks of the trade, and while my skill is nothing compared to the boys of the family, being the only girl – I can still build some shit.

It had been a long time since I had picked up a hammer, other than to hang picture frames.  I always loved to build things too.  That wasn’t really an option in the second marriage.  My vision didn’t line up with his – so it was better to just set that to the side, it was better than arguing.

You see, I got Marley at a time where I was transitioning into the single life, once again, and this time, in a different capacity than ever before.  At the time I didn’t know it, but looking back now.  I don’t know – he brought me companionship in a time where I needed it the most.

As I have said previously, single life isn’t for the weak.  There are a lot of lonely nights – and often times you can find yourself losing sleep, or losing yourself.  Trying to analyze your life, trying figure it all out.  Scary nights.  Getting used to the silence.  It was all scary.  Yes, even though I hate to admit it, even those crying nights.  You might say, well you got a kid.  Yea – a grown one, and even two years ago – she was still 17 – she was still gone most weekends.

Well do you know what happens when you get a pup?  They keep you busy.  They give you someone to talk to.  They kiss your tears away.  They curl up to you when you need them.  He makes me laugh.  He protects the house.  He watches movies, and even is my personal trainer.  Yep my personal trainer, cause he loves him some jogging.

 

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Marley Playing

With having Marley by my side, I guess in a way – it helped me learn more about me, because I am more willing to do things alone, because really I am not alone.  He is here.  He helped me paint the house we are in, helped me build quite a few picture frames.  He stands in the kitchen and watches me cook without saying anything when I am sneaking some snacksies.  Probably cause he just waiting on his.

Most people think he got the name from the movie, but actually after The Marley family.  And while I joke that Marley is nothing like his name intended, cause he has no chill, in reality – he name is very suiting.  He brought me love and peace at a time in which a war was raging within my soul.  He helped me get back to my creative and adventurous side.  He is my peace.  I mean you walk into your doors, and like how could your day not be left at the door, when they are so excited to see you??? Like they love you – even if you are covered in sweat, dirt, they gives no fks.  They like come here let me lick yo face! Hahahaha.

 

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So the next time you look at Mars and say he isn’t my son – you can kiss my jelly fish.

 

Marley & Me

 

Being Fat is Painful

My Fight

As discussed previously I have gastroparesis.  Today I am struggling.  A flare up from veggies.  Yes veggies.  Fibrous foods.  The struggle is real – but this is a fight I plan on beating.  Pushing through to the finale 🙂

Are Fat Girls Easy?

I have to ask this question because being a fat girl – for some reason men like to come at me sideways.

Hey I get it.  We are fat – so you automatically assume we all have some deep insecurities that would surely at least get you laid tonight.

Ha!  I have pissed a lot of men off in my lifetime with the ego busting balls I carry around in my purse.

First off, there ain’t shit easy about me.

Secondly, most women at my age can tell when a man is just there to fulfill some sort of fetish fantasy.  YEA MEN WE KNOW

Third thing – only few can handle all that lovings – so weak men need not apply.

I also can’t stand a closet chubby chaser.  If you so ashamed baby you shouldn’t be in my inbox.  Apparently being a chubby chaser is shameful, but being a dick head isn’t?  Some of you guys out there that want to shame the same plus size beauties in public that you jerking off too in private.

Yea we know.

People have preferences.

You love you a large lady – then love her, and be happy about it.

If you love you a little lady – then love her, and be happy about it.

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Changing Cheese Sauce – The Kicking Keto Recipe

The Yum Yum 

Yea, you heard me, and if you are following me on IG, or FB then you already know what is up!!!!

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The Changing Cheese Sauce has forever changed my life. I make 95% of my meals at home.  Not only can I cook, but finances are tight – and eating out – it’s expensive.  And to be honest – the only time I don’t eat at home is when I splurge for a hoagie from Wawa.  Yea – a hoagie.  The wheat one.  Yes I am on keto.  Modified keto, and I eat grains, typically two times a week.  That hoagie is my payday special – and has been for the better of two years now.  All $5.69 of it!! Balling on a budget.

Anyways back to this deliciousness of cheese.

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I call it the changing cheese sauce – because one little trick – and bam a completely difference sauce.

The best thing about this recipe – is you make it yours.

It is pretty basic, and easy too, so for families – it’s perfect.

It is a 4 ingredient sauce
My Changing Cheese Sauce is as followed:
1/2 a stick of unsalted REAL butter.  Walmart has 4 sticks for just ver  $3. Comes is salted or unsalted, I only ever buy unsalted out of preference.
1 bag of shredded cheese of ur choice, hence the changing cheese sauce because this is really a simple and universal recipe. The recipe pictured is white sharp cheddar. Again, Walmart for just over 2.00. U can use as much cheese here depending on how cheesy or soupy u want it. This was made with just a little over half a bag.
Heavy Whipping cream. This will depend on how much u are making. Since I have an empty nest, I make generally no more than 8 ounces, which I always have some left over. A small carton of hwc is just over 2.00 at walmart. If u are feeding a family I suggest modifying it according to that. If u decide to use a full container of hwc for a family, make sure u add more cheese ♡♡
The last and probably most important ingredient is Weber Roasted Garlic and Herb Seasoning. I use about 2 tbsp, but I love garlic.
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I take the butter and the seasoning and melt it in a pot together, then I pour in the hwc and then the cheese. Stir until completely melted down. Make sure u watch it cause it does cook kind of quick on medium high heat. Roughly around 5 minutes.
The bam pour it over ur favorite foods. I also pour over chicken in the oven and broil it to make a cheesy crust
This is a keto friendly recipe but can be for all others as well.
Happy Grubbing Yall!!

CBD THC & ME

CBD,THC, ME

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Photo by Michael Fischer on Pexels.com

My life with gastroparesis poses quite a few issues for me.  One of them is learning to work around it.  There are things that I still don’t get to do; however I feel that through my diet, and exercise routines I am starting to where I can get back to enjoying life.  It has been a rough few days, but I know like all pain – it is temporary and will pass.  I just keep reminding myself to breathe.  It is funny that I compare the pain to labor pains, cause I can still hear my Mid-wife – Dr. Delrose whisper to me, just breathe through the pain, something she said to me as my daughter was ripping my lower half of my body apart to make her grand arrival 🙂 It very much feels like that – but more stabby.

Bad episodes are pretty trying – and I have learnt to be forthcoming in the fact that I have this condition – because honestly, unless you have seen an episode, or know anything about it – it probably doesn’t sound so bad, but if you have ever had food poisoning, then you understand at least that part of it.  If you take the pain and ripping apart cramps from labor pain and combine that with a dose of food poisioing – then you might be close to a bad episode.

Now for me bad episodes don’t come near as often as they used to.  I have to contribute that to the keto, working out, and diet modifications.  I mean, you only have to become violently ill so many times before you really deep dive into your condition.

This week’s episode, brought on by broccoli, well I was really thinking for a minute I was going to have to go to the hospital. Not that they are able to do anything really, other than Zofran – which I have, maybe some more pills, that will make me feel sick. So really there is nothing that can be done.  You deal, and you keep it moving.

Luckily I am feeling a little better today.  But I am weak, tired, and ready for this episode to subside.

But heyy – I had peanut butter and whipped cream for dinner so like it ain’t all bad 🙂

Happy days y’all.

Fried Pecan Pie Danish – Easy Recipe

Yumminess

This recipe is quite easy – and honestly universal, and it’s scrumptious.

It is pretty basic.

Take some bread and flatten out.  For most of my recipes I used Arnold’s breads.  Pretty much out of preference – but also because I prefer their grain breads over the rest.  Now this is their Oatnut Bread.  Which I have to say was quite perfect for this recipe, since it is a thicker loaf.

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Then take a spoonful of cream cheese, I used whipped, and place in each corner of the bread.  Then press.

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Then you will take your beautiful bumps and cut them into 4 sections.

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Press gently around your scoops of cream cheese. Then cover and place in the freezer for at least 30 minutes.

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The next step is pretty easy too.  Fry them bad boys up in some unsweetened sweet cream butter.  OHHHHHHHHHHH YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shake that butter baby hahaha.

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We aren’t done yet – cause y’all seen where I said PECAN right – alright then.  Pay attention to momma.

Once they have a nice light golden brown toasting – then add a drizzle of Agave syrup and pecans.  I get chopped pecans – and Agave in the raw.  Finish turning for a few minutes till your crust becomes caramelized.

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I guess I should also tell you to cook it on medium high heat.

Prep time is really like 10 minutes, cook time – roughly 10 minutes.

Your family said make this now!

HAHAHA

All made with healthy ingredients too – but I promise you will feel like you should be mad at yourself for indulging in this amazingly easy recipe.  Let’s be honest though – it is buttered toast with cream cheese – just better.

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Running Game? You thought! My Relationship Revenge

Running Game

Ever had someone who you were with that thought they were running game?  But you had already known – and in fact were running game every since you had found out?

I am a reactive person.  So however you treat me – you are going to get it back.

Now I know two wrongs don’t make a right, but I consider it more of a life lesson.  I came into a relationship with honesty and loyalty.  I catch you slipping, and I am going to make you feel stupid.

I make sure that person knows too.  I only play along for a certain amount of time, then bam! I bust it wide open with the truth, including what I was doing.

Kind of goes like this:

Him:  Hey baby

Me: Heyyyy

Him:  Wanted to see if you could swing by tonight.

Me:  Oh, yea sure, but it would have to be after this date.

Him:  What date – what the fuck are you talking about?

Me:  Oh, so you know how you had went to the movies with Tammy 3 weeks ago?  Yea I heard that movie was pretty good, so when Jarrod asked me on a date – I figured I would watch the same one.

Him:  What the fuck?  Who is Tammy, what the fuck are you talking about.

Me:  sends picture

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Photo by Nathan Engel on Pexels.com

 

Him:  Look she is just a friend.

Me:  Oh yea and so is Jarrod, but really hoping to make him a friend with benefits.

Him:  You’re a fucking bitch.

Me:  Yes I know – maybe next time you will think twice before you take your date to the movies where 1 of my (900) cousins works at.

Yes I know it is awful.  But someone needs to turn this little boys into men, and maybe they will at least think twice before next time.

We all know he still looking over his back.

HAHAHA

Boy BYE!

 

 

The Suga Woes- Killing it With Keto

A little background about me and food, I love to create. It’s experimental for me.  Scientific.  Especially sugar.  A very universal and divine creation by God that has a wide range of capabilities including but not limited to making your thighs magically grow. Now listen this isn’t a sugar bashing blog post, I mean after all I am an amateur baker, so don’t get it twisted, I respect sugar and it’s place in the kitchen.  However; I have taken it out of my day-to-day life, and use it as intended, as a treat, and on occasion only.  Now that sounds easy, yeah maybe if you aren’t from the south – where the preferred drinks are sweet tea, and sugary milk coffee.  Now I make some of the best sweet tea in Pasco County.  My Nannie had them sweet southern cooking skills, we know how to make a 2 cup sugar strong sweet tea that is the only thing that saves you from the hot Florida sun on a summer day when you’re doing yard work.  Yea I know about that life.

Now like I said in my last blog post I was going to go into what I did differently.  Well one of my friends was doing the Atkins diet and I kept hearing rumors about the keto diet.  Well, really they are about the same diet.  When first considering it – I was like ugh this diet won’t work – lots of grease, lots of heavy protein – and with my gastroparesis – I just didn’t think the diet would be for me.  Well still thinking about doing some of the things from the diet – I started really considering the giving up the sugar.  I was reading so many reports about sugar and what it does chemically to the body.  So I figured what the hell – what do I have to lose?  It is the one thing that I hadn’t taken out of my diet, the sugar in my drinks.

So in November I started trading out my coffee with stevia.  Wasn’t bad – and I also liked the flavor ideas with the heavy whipping cream – although I never did the butter thing in the coffee – I just couldn’t.  I mean it’s supposed to be wonderful – it’s just I can’t get past the idea of drinking butter, although I love the stuff.  Anyways.  I was noticing that by not waking up and injecting my body with cane sugar – but with stevia, some of my cravings had died off.  I wasn’t craving the candy bowl at work as much – and was more so craving water over tea.  I also noticed something else – the first week I dropped 4 pounds – and all I did was give up sugar in my coffee.

Well come January 1rst – and clearly having a midlife crisis since I now have an empty nest – I really started kicking the research into over drive.  I researched how keto was utilized in so many different treatments and how people were feeling.  So I decided to give full keto a try.  I kind of still don’t eat a lot of red meats – because they are heavy on my gut – but I do eat a ton of chicken.  The biggest struggle – my dam sweet tea.  I was a gallon solo a day drinker during the summer.  Don’t set there and judge me unless you dined at my table and had some cause you don’t know – better ask some body hahaha. Here’s the thing though – the definition of chaos is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting  different result.  I analyzed my habits.  Tracked my food intake on myfitness pal cause it’s free – and if you aren’t tracking – and trying to lose weight – you are at a complete disadvantage and you’re probably making it harder than it needs to be – and most of the time some minor adjustments to your diet could yield major changes and results.  Every body is different – therefore every diet should be catered for you and your lifestyle.  I recommend a nutritionist if you can afford one – but if you can’t that is the best place to start.  And why do a crash diet?  Like make trade offs one by one?  Why torture yourself? I monitored my food intake, started just trading off things. I am on a low carb high fat diet, but did it gradually, and still continue to modify because routines get modified, so your diet needs to be adjusted.  For the first few months on keto – I did no physical exercise what so ever – at all.  It really is a great diet, single-handed.  After you get past the first two month are so, you really get into the swing of things – you just have to stick with it and trust the process, and remember to not let one day ruin your attempt – just jump back on.  You also really need to listen to your body.  Notice the way you feel and remember that if you are doing the keto diet – you really need to research it, cause I hear a lot of y’all talking about you stayed at 20 carbs a day – for like 3 months – that is NOT the meal plan and you should be cycling  – but I mean you live your best life hahaha.  Do what you want.  When I start feeling worn down – I know a higher carb day is in order.  Just remember that this shouldn’t be done until you gain control over the diet – again, for me that was around the end of month two.  The diet must be followed on point in order for it to be the most effective.  Research, buy a book, and really give the process a chance if that is the route you are going.  For some reason keto just had this effect  over me.  I know how I feel when I stick to it, and I know how I feel when I don’t and really it’s a huge difference.  Keto, more than any other diet helped me balance my plate a little better.  I still eat breads, but like 1 week a month, and generally some type of Arnold Bread – because I find they taste the best – and also have fewer carbs than the rest of the breads.

If you get into the habit of saying meats, cheeses, healthy fats, vegetables, you will remember the things that you can eat.

There is a lot that I have learned along the way – like did you know the harder the cheese – the lower the carbs?  In example, extra sharp white cheddar is a little better for you than a softer cheese like a colby?  See little tradeoffs to lower the amount of your daily carbs goes a long way.

That20180916_161631 is where I began.

In the next episode I’ll talk about how I got off my fat ass and got to working out and how I have managed to clock in over 200 KM the last two months, but also how that freaked up my diet for a minute.

 

P.S.

For those of you that like videos you should check out my youtube channel

 

Why Do We Stay In Dead End Relationships?

Probably for the same reason we stay in dead end jobs.  Partly because we are lazy, and partly because it is comfortable.  I speak from experience.  I mean how many times does a man need to screw up before I am like okay – you need to go?  Apparently quite a bit.

I have been trying to figure that question out for some time now.  Being alone – it takes work.  I mean sleeping alone in itself can be scary.  Not to mention the feeling of abandonment when your used to your phone being blown up day in and day out.

We stay hopeful too.  Like oh, he made a mistake, but he is going to change.  And then as women we feel like we are raising this boy into a man – so we feel accomplished.  What I have realized though – is when you have to be the boy’s momma – he will always make mistakes – and you will always be left cleaning up the mess.

How many times have you been disrespected in any capacity – and yet stayed – and have you ever asked yourself why?

I have come to know my reasons, and I will be candid.

First off – I like comfortable.  From everything in life to my jammies to my relationship.  I want a man to fit my lifestyle like a glove, don’t complicate shit for me – it will irritate me.

Secondly I never felt like I deserved more than what was in front of me.  OMG I know, but hey self-realization is hard – but when you become honest with yourself – your life starts to come together.

Third – I am lazy – I would rather comfortable and knowing that the person in front of me is an ass hole over the next one that I don’t know – and I don’t know what they bring to the table – cause God knows the other switch outs didn’t play too good in my favor in the past.

Fourth – loneliness used to scare the shit out of me.  Now I rather enjoy it – and often find that now it takes more work to be social than to be alone.  This one is the hardest. Often times, we as women, we don’t give ourselves enough credit.  I guess maybe from the teachings of Adam and Eve, we as women feel like we need a man to thrive, to survive, but I am here to tell you – I have been alone for the past 2 years – and it has been the hardest, most rewarding 2 years of my life.  Learning to be alone – you realize how to love yourself.

Now the benefit to the 4th, is that when you are left alone, on your own, you learn your true strengths, and with that – the other 3 get cancelled out.

Being alone isn’t for the weak – cause God knows there would be times to where I didn’t feel like I could go on any longer alone, but you stay with your grind, and you figure shit out.  The fear that I have now is that I am so happy in my own little world that I won’t let a man be a part of it hahahaha – they have a tendency to ruin things for me. Hahaha.

Relationships take work – but I have to tell all you beautiful bitches a secret.

People only treat you how you allow them to treat you.

Yea you heard me.  PEOPLE ONLY TREAT YOU HOW YOU ALLOW THEM TO.

Repeat it again PEOPLE ONLY TREAT YOU HOW YOU ALLOW THEM TO

Speak up for yourself .  USE YOUR WORDS.  Express your feelings, we need to work on our own communication skills before we can expect our spouses to do the same.

We have become a society in which we are in constant need of fixing other people’s life – we don’t realize our own life needs some fixing.

Start with YOU, cause I promise in your quest to repair yourself – people filter themselves out naturally!!!!!!

Have a fabulous day my friends.IMG_20180919_201935_891

 

 

 

 

Coffee in My Pocket

I average anywhere from 5-6 hours of sleep a night.  I get freaking tired.  I love me some dam coffee.  Doesn’t matter what part of the day.  All day – every day.  I typically have to discipline myself to stick to only having it in the morning.

Coffee In My Pocket – Wawa Edition

But like I had to go get my rent money – and Wawa was smelling some type of good with their coffee brewing asses.  I walk in – with just the intention of getting my money out their free ATM – and I walk in the door – and it smells like fresh brew.  Ass holes.  I mean I got the sugar free coffee – but the carb content even in the little one is still higher than I would have liked – but like it’s coffee.  I deserved it – I have peddled and waddled my fat ass through 146 miles this month.

I enjoyed every dam sip of it too.