I know how gross a woman that doesn’t wash her hair but once every 7 to 8 days!! Hahaha – that was my first thought too when I came across an article while researching thinning hair.
Yep, I said thinning hair. You are probably thinking to yourself dam, she only 37 wth???
Well if you have read the blog about the surgeries I had undergone a few years ago – then you know I had a full abdominal hysterectomy. That sent me into menopause. YES MENOPAUSE. I was just getting into my early 30s when what didn’t seem so bad (no period) turned out to have several, very noticeable, reprocussions but again – the surgery wasn’t optional, so I guess this over the alternative was still a win. So what the hell does menopause have to do with hair? Well, apparently makes your dam hair thin out – to make you feel even older than you already feel because well sometimes life just can have it’s way with us because that’s just life. You deal and figure out ways to prevent or fix the issues that show up. Our bodies of ever-changing vessels, that is not the same one second to the next.
So here comes the research and configuration of the plan of attack cause I am NOT ABOUT THAT LIFE, NOT YET. I mean I know it is inevitable and sometimes it gets taken for medical reasons – and I know it grows back – blah blah blah. Here is the thing – my hair was the one part of my body that I took pride in. Mainly because it was the one part of my body that I wasn’t miserable with. I took pride in it – but I was always rough with my hair. Being in sports, and growing up with Agua Net and curling irons, well yea burn baby burn. Once I had become an adult – I wasn’t awful to my hair – but most of the time it was up in a tight bun. As a mother, I was running around between work, school, and kid, no time for hair care, other than the constant washing it.
I would also like to mention that not all hair products are created equal. I grew up washing my hair with Dawn, and Sauve. The Dawn for when we ran out of Sauve hahahaha. Hey even as an adult – I have never been shy to stock up with some Sauve. You gotta do what you gotta do to make it and some months it’s Pantene and some its Sauve. I am NOT talking about Sauve professionals either hahaha. Balance people, and that was always better than when we did without. Single momma y’all so be judgy all you want cause at the end of the day I know what a blessing is and so does my child.
I am not going to go into which product is better than which – cause that isn’t what this post is about. Just pay attention to what is in your shampoo and conditioner – and with what I am about to tell you – if you follow you will save money in both, so maybe you can spring to spend a little more since you will be using less. Everyone’s hair is different, so what worked for me, may not work for you. Although, I have found that it’s working for the women around me. When my daughter lived with me, she is now an adult and living on her own, we could easily go through a bottle of each a week. We both have long hair – and we are active – so we would wash our hair just about every day or every other day, but I would never make it past day 2 cause my hair would be so greasy. That is of course a great reminder that your hair is gross and needs to be washed. I have fine hair, and as people with fine hair know – looks like we poured baby oil on the top of our scalps on that 3rd day. And plus like I live in Florida. You don’t walk outside without being covered in sweat – so like ya kind of need to wash your hair every day, OR DO YOU?
So back to the thinning mane of mine. So one day, I am picking up my loving daughter from her father’s. A man I married at 18, he was 17, divorced 2 years into the marriage. We have a weird relationship. When our relationship ended, it ended, we never looked back. We both moved on, and all that. When we get around each other though – we kind of are mean to each other but playful. Always bluntly honest. I will call him Shrek and he will poke fun of my high forehead. Yea I have a big forehead hahaha. I was raised with boys – so our demeanor with each other is just reminiscent of childhood friends and nothing more. So anyways, I had to explain that because if I were tell that you that my baby daddy said I was going bald – you would be like wtf???? Hahaha – but he was right – and if anyone was going to say something it was always gonna be him or my kid – the only two people that would say it in a jokingly but loving manner. Well now of course the whole ride home I’m checking the rear view every chance I get – running my fingers through my hair – obsessing – so I finally look over at Kate and ask her. She says “Momma I didn’t want to be the one to tell you – but yea a little – like it isn’t bad – but it’s noticeable.”
Now here is the thing – I kind of already knew. My hair had been shedding more than usual, noticeable in the shower. Here is the thing though – I have long hair – down to my fat arse. Losing hair in the shower – it is a normal process. Like I shed hair just breathing so to see a little extra you figure it is just a stress related ordeal and you move on about your business until your baby and baby daddy wanna pop off the mouth with some true shit that got you all up in your feels about your life.
Well thank God this whole ordeal happened – because I went to the doctor and questioned him about my quick aging scalp. The explanation was quick and to the point. I was post menopausal – this is your new life.
So I went home – bought some Rogaine and sat in the bathroom for 2 hours crying. Then put my big girl panties on and started doing some research. I will be straight forward – Rogaine works, but it takes months. I didn’t like how it left my hair feeling, and I am a constant hair toucher, so I used it for a while off and on – which I am sure if you use as directed – works even better cause I was off and on with that more than my ex – and that was quite frequent hahhahaha.
Well I had went and got my hair trimmed at Walmart in Land O Lakes. Yea – judge IT IDC – Wal-mart got the goods. Single mom’s got to do in all in one trip. Cash the check, get them groceries, grab that dog food, get those school supplies, pick up some shoes, get that hair cut, grab you some Subway, get your kid’s eyes checked. And all you gotta do – throw the kid in the cart and go.
So here we are – and I am asking for a very specific 1/2 inch no more, and the hair dresser – asks me “do you wear your hair that tight all the time, did you know that is bad for your scalp?” Well no, no I fkng didn’t. Great. So not only is my body playing against me – but I am playing against it. If you live in Florida you would understand that it is hard to have long hair on your back, especially when it is sticking to the sweat on your love handles when your shirt lifts up. Most of the time, women with long hair only take it down when indoors for the night.
So this leads to a deep dive into my research project – looking high and low for all the dumb shit I am doing to my hair. One of the biggest things – WASHING IT TOO MUCH.
ALRIGHT ALRIGHT – SO HOW TF AM I SUPPOSED TO MAKE THAT WORK IN FLORIDA, AND WITH MY LIFESTYLE?
I AIN’T WALKING AROUND WITH NO NASTY SMELLY HAIR.
Well I came across a few articles that dicussed a few different things that I tried. A lot of them I just couldn’t keep up with. There wasn’t enough “cleansing” involved for someone like me who works out most days. Well I finally came across an article about a gradual wash decrease. So I started with that, and incorporated a few other things. Now gradual increase was a process and defintely something you have to get used to. It was a process that took almost 2 months. Often because I would dead stop. The process is quite simple. Just stop washing it for an extra day each week. So if you normally wash every day – you move to every other day. Then every 3 days, then every 4, etc. Well I finally found a schedule that works pretty well for me. And my hair is quite thicker. Now I have added some product – but you use very minimal amounts – and really you can use some alternatives which I will go over. I will go over a typical 7 day schedule with you. Again – this works for me, it won’t work for every one – but if you can train your hair to wash minimally – you will start seeing the health benefits in your hair.
Monday morning: Full wash – shampoo/conditioner (I alternate shampoos – but I get them all from WallyWorld y’all – just get what works for you)
Tuesday – NADA
Wednesday – NYC Primer (it is just a spritz, so it is quick and smells good, think of it like a perfume for your hair, I got a sample free from Ipsy and fell in love)
Thursday – dry shampoo at top BEFORE workout, hair mask on tips before shower. Rinse both out in shower.
Friday – NYC Primer
Saturday – water wash, and condition tips. I work in the yard on Saturdays, my hair gets dirt, grass, etc all up in it. A water wash is simply just that – rinse thoroughly with warm water and really work to clean the hair out – just rinse some conditioner through the ends.
Sunday – NADA
My hair is much thicker, and stronger. My ends are healthier.
A few other things I stopped.
Brushing hair while wet.
I leave my hair down as much as possible – and use clips when possible. I make every attempt to avoid tight buns, make em loose ladies.
This worked for me, not saying it will work for you too. I just kind of figure all those oils I was washing out – my hair needed.
By the way – when you hair is in the “dirty stage” it is easier to style and curl.