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Now this post may come off bitchy, so you must read through to the end to really understand my point of view. And once you get done, even if you are married, you will most likely understand.
Now you might say to yourself – just because you get involved with someone doesn’t mean you have to kill your diet, but you would be wrong – cause I know how I am. I know what I am capable of.
I also know how I am in relationships.
Let’s start off with the basics. From the start – a lot of dates – are surrounded by what? Yea – food. Dinner, movies, food. This is where you start to correlate foods with memories.
Then let’s go into the time. You see, someone who gets up early in the mornings to workout, well after working all day – I’m too tired to go out. The weekends come, and I have to take care of things around the house, and spend time with Marley & Leo (my pups). Now even if I do make the time, guess what happens? I go out, then go home, then I don’t get enough rest – so then no work out – then I hate you. Hahahaha.
I am also not oblivious to the reality in the success my weight loss either.
IT IS EASIER FOR ME TO LOOSE WEIGHT NOW THAT I AM ALONE
I am a cooking queen. I love to create, I love to cook for people. In my house – before my child became an adult and moved out – we ate dinner at home everyday. Now that I have an empty nest – I don’t have to cook, and often don’t. I mean it’s just me – I can make my dinners in a few minutes flat. My snacks generally consist of cheese or peanut butter but all lchf items. When I am in a relationship, I use my food to do the seducing for me. I want to cook at every opportunity to not only showcase my skills, but for level of involvement. I enjoy an interactive man in the kitchen – but one that is suggestive and not controlling. It’s fun when you find someone you love to cook with – but then again – that is again the issue – YOU ARE ALWAYS COOKING SO YOU ARE ALWAYS EATING. This goes for moms and dads too. Children are little food monsters. They are growing – they need to be fed. We eat when they eat – so yea – it is harder when you have kids, or in a relationship.
So yea – dating could destroy my diet.
It’s pretty busy for the police tonight. I’m sitting on my back porch and there are sirens in every direction.
Like what are y’all doing out there ?
Y’all need to calm the hell down and relax cause something going on out there tonight.
I lie to myself every weekend and say I’m going to rest, visit friends, and take it easy.
And just like clock work, every weekend something comes up, and there is no rest and still tons to do.
Now I ponder going to sleep or finishing chores so I can do absolutely Nada tomorrow.
But really will I do Nada? I wish my rise and grind button had an off switch.
Yea ladies I would like to discuss this bedroom no rise to shine issue.
I would have to gander that if you ever had one in your hen house then you know exactly what I am referring to, but what happens when it becomes more than an occasional occurrence?
I mean we all get the drunken Rooster, the before first pee in the morning Rooster. But those are typically rare. And we understand those. But what about the times where he should have been able to wake the neighborhood? Cock a doodle Doo you into a great morning.
Well it becomes a bad morning right?
Oh Jesus the questions we ask ourselves. What happens when the Rooster rises but then falls back to sleep during? Like goodbye self esteem hello question every body part, and sink into a slight depression over his ignorance to not see all this yum yum.
Then the awkward questions afterwards. And roosters, it pisses the hens off. Like, we expect you to rise and shine. We consider it not only a disappointment in you but also in ourselves.
Yea there’s going to be questions. Whether they are voiced or not depends on the hen, but there will be assumptions of the Rooster hitting other hen houses on the way home from work. Or if the Rooster somehow bumped his head and no longer finds the fluffy hen so fantastically gorgeous anymore and has lost interest in those thick thighs. I mean the possibilities are endless.
I would like to know from both sides. The women, have you experienced this, if so, what was the outcome?
From the men, which I doubt many would be brave enough to answer, but if any takers, if you have had this issue, what was the reason why? And were you brave enough to discuss the reasons why at the time?
I am a talker, so when it has happened, and questioned it, I would always get “can we just leave it alone”
Yea sure noodle boy, I’ll just sit here and die in my feelings, pondering which bitch ur talking to this week. Hahahaha.
I had seen a meme about a woman trying to seduce her husband while he was watching TV.
I have never understood that. like if your woman is trying to be sexy, why do men have to act like they don’t see shit? Men and monkey game shit.
You know what that does? It causes her to feel like she isn’t sexy, then a few years later the man will say, you never get sexy for me anymore.
Well no shit Sherlock. It takes a lot for someone to feel comfortable in their own skin, so when a man ignores a woman’s advances it makes a woman feel ugly.
Yet these are often also the same men cheating with the hag from the corner too. Hahahaha. Like the kitty purring, why do y’all ignore that but then go pet someone else’s kitty? Like what is wrong with y’all in the head for real?
Thank God women love petting their own kitties.
Hahahaha happy weekend bitches.
Y’all it’s a beautiful day outside. Kick your kicks out the house And go enjoy this beautiful dam day. Slay all day.
Toss a ball, have some tea. Put the phones down and take it all in.
Big momma out 😉
Life is nothing more than trial and error. In each and everything we do. If you take these as learning lessons then you can find ways to make the situation better. We don’t walk without falling from time to time. We don’t stang strong without knowing what it’s like to lay weak. It is in our struggle that we learn our blessings. Life will humble you, embrace it as a learning lesson. But it order to do so, you must be willing to educate yourself through your life. Learn about yourself. Learn who you are. This comes when you begin to be true to yourself. True to your core. And remember where there is pain, there is healing. Where there is healing, there is acceptance, and where there is acceptance, there is love.
Happy Weekend Y’all
Some of you may think anxiety can be controlled by thought or emotion – and to some degree yes it can be. I utilize methods like meditation, breathing exercises to keep them at bay.
Unless I have a bad one. I have closet anxiety. One the surface I look controlled, solid. On this inside it is like a million minions going into different directions all at the same time.
When you have anxiety – sometimes you can really be the toxic one in the relationship.
Now, let me explain. Cause I know some of y’all like whhhhaaaaaaattt tttttthhhhhheeeee fuuuuuuuckkkkkkkkk she just say.
I have anxiety, and I know I can be toxic in a relationship.
I am one of those to where when I feel fine, everything is fine, but when I am upset – everything makes me upset.
And I mean everything. And for a man, that is a lot to deal with. I am not super emotional – but I get snappy. Pissy. Attitude. Everyone’s anxiety is different – and I know my condition crippled most of the relationships, but because I was with the wrong kind of person.
The problem is, that never once I have I ever had a man take the time to even try to pinpoint the issue, or even just accept the fact that it was just an episode, and cuddle me, instead of responding with more negativity.
I know sounds complex right. Like how is a pissy woman asking a man to cuddle her when she is being a bitch. Well because – that fixes it.
When someone is dealing with their anxiety – they just need someone to talk them through it.
For every person it is different, but if your spouse has anxiety – I will give you a few pointers that would have helped me.
- Take some of the work off of their back. If they are in the kitchen doing the dishes, and appear to be in an episode, grab the sponge, and tell them to go take their cranky ass to bed, or go get in the bath.
- If they wake up cranky, cuddle them. Make their coffee for them – it is like a switch – showing that thoughtfulness – can really change a person’s outlook for the day.
- Reassurance. I have dealt with a lot, I don’t need constant reassurance – but I do appreciate a man that can say “you are the one” and actually mean it. Someone with anxiety – typically never feels good enough – so this helps them cope with that.
- Do NOT use the condition against them. We are already self-conscious about it – we don’t need you to put it out to make us feel even worse about ourselves.
- Know that even though, I am a strong woman, like most people with anxiety, and I got me 95% – that 5% is when I need a soft hand on my shoulder.
- Don’t make fun of us. I often stutter when I am upset. I stutter because sometimes I get incredibly excited, and the words just come out all fucked up. I don’t need someone poking fun at that.
- Be loving, and kind.
I have accepted my condition, and I deal with it.
This is the main reason why I will NOT have a man in my life that brings frustration, or aggravation. I physically cannot handle that, nor do I want to.
To be honest, it is pretty easy to help someone through an episode, you just have to take the time to listen, to care, and to love.
Then it passes, just like all storms.